To spot a narcissist early or before the relationship gets serious and dense, here are a few signs or Traits of a Narcissist. Save Yourself before it is too late! Narcissists have some ingrained traits that may help their victims to spot them easily.
NPD(Narcissistic Personality Disorder) or Narcissism portrays some common toxic traits in an intensified state than others. In psychological terms, narcissists who suffer from NPD(Narcissistic Personality Disorder) portray these emotions and traits in a greater magnitude than others. These emotions include a boosted sense of self-importance, inflated self-worth, and a constant need for admiration, adoration, and validation.
What is a Narcissist?
Narcissists are someone who is often characterized and peculiar regarding their trait of being self-absorbed. They hardly think about others. They always prioritize their own self and their needs above others. They have a high sense of self-importance, so much so that they might even ignore their own children or their own parents. They even tend to ignore their life partners too, in some cases. Thus it can be concluded, that narcissists only care for themselves, their needs and desires, and their wishes.
Characteristics of a Narcissist
Narcissists possess some traits or characteristics that make them a little hard to deal with. Some peculiar narcissistic traits include,
- Lack of sensitivity and empathy.
- Are self-centric.
- Blame others for your mistakes.
- Have unhealthy relations.
- Arrogance and anger is your first reaction to any problems.
- Hate changes and also cannot take them well.
- Are emotionally unstable and unavailable.
- Takes advantage of others easily.
- Are abusive.
- Lack of self-awareness and self-reflection.
- Always expect more from others.
- Boosted sense of self-importance.
- Obsession with image and reputation.
- Tendency to manipulate others mostly by gaslighting them.
- Preoccupation with fantasies of power, success, looks, and money.
According to DSM (The Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorder (DSM) is a reference book broadly used by psychology experts and mental health professionals worldwide. The DSM provides clear references describing mental disorders, their symptoms, and everything related to them.
DSM describes everything so clearly that it makes the diagnosis process transparent. Thus to determine whether someone is narcissistic, there is a list of symptoms mentioned in the DSM-V, out of which if the individual has any five or at least five or all symptoms then they can be termed under the category of narcisists.
Having one or two traits of narcissism is usual, but when a person’s social functioning is hindered due to certain behavioral traits, then it may qualify them for a diagnosis of Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD).
Let us know the symptoms list according to the DSM,
- Having a self-perception of being perfect, intelligent, superior, attractive, powerful, etc.
- Having the need to get constant attention from other people.
- Obsession with fantasies like having unlimited success, the power that may daunting, fame, unsurpassed intelligence (the cerebral narcissist), unavoidable charm, and beauty (the somatic narcissist), incomparable sexual performance (sexual narcissist), or everlasting attractiveness.
- To achieve personal gains and growth, exploit others.
- Being jealous and having a perception that others might be equally jealous of them.
- Having a sense of entitlement and expectations of being treated as someone superior or greater than others.
- Self-perception of being grandiose, unique, high-status, and superior to others.
- Unwillingness to have empathy and sympathy for others, their wishes, feelings, and emotions.
- Requires excessive adoration, attention, and validation in the affirmations.
- Lacks Empathy.
These traits affect the lives of narcissistic individuals so evidently that they are unable to develop meaningful relationships with others. This means they have unhealthy relations with their partners, hardly make friends, cannot adjust with others, and have difficulty maintaining relations.
20 Traits of a Narcissist
To spot a narcissist timely, here are some traits of a narcissist, suggested by psychologists and mental health experts,
1. Thrives on being the center of attention
According to a study published in Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, they found that narcissists love the limelight and get comfortable while seeking attention from others. Their behavior is often attention-seeking and to gain eyes wherever they go.
Narcissists are often driven by admiration, adoration, and validation that they gain from others. They thrive while being the center of attraction by attracting attention due to their grandiose and attention-seeking behavior.
2. Uses Sexuality
Most Narcissists have high sex drives and thus love physical intimacy.
Narcissists love a sensational, hot, and sensuous session in bed, be it with their partner or be it with multiple partners as they are thrill seekers, who would happily and joyfully agree to get into a physical relationship with you. They may never really consider their partner’s feelings and how their behavior might make their partner feel.
Narcissists have altogether different approaches towards sex. They may not get involved sexually with someone out of love or affection but only to fulfill their own needs and to feel powerful, and influential, to have control and seek pleasure.
3. Seeks Violence
Narcissists may also be violent in some cases. They may be a stalker, a murderer, a serial killer, a husband who beat their wife, or also be a traitor.
Narcissists are full of rage and may lash out at people every now and then. They may use other people as scapegoats or punching bags. They have bad impulse control.
They often seek revenge on people and also be physically violent if needed.
The victims of the narcissist’s abuse might be shocked, dismayed, and displeased to know this but they have been swayed under the false impression of the narcissist’s care, love, or bonding. Narcissists may actually be brainwashing their victims by bonding more closely with them just to gain what they want.
Once their purpose with you is finished you might be disheartened to know the consequences, but they might leave just within a snap.
They might be onto their next target whereas their victims might be left clueless and suffering.
The merger of narcissism and sadism gives birth to a sadist narcissist or a malignant narcissist. A sadistic narcissist derives pleasure by gaining more and more narcissistic supply in twisted ways. Their ways and methods include punishing others who are not obedient, cooperative, admiring, and forbearing with them.
Sadistic narcissists also present exaggerated versions of themselves where they are passive-aggressive, abusive, and toxic. They also exhibit vexation by exhibiting disapproval, dislike, disapprobation, disagreements, or criticism sometimes without using words but rather with their nonverbal actions or sometimes with visible actions and measures.
6. Substance Abuse
Drugs, alcohol, you name it and they do it. Narcissists often demand gratification for whatever they do that may involve others.
7. False Twin Flames
There are many possibilities that you may come across many false alarms in the form of a true twin flame. Such people can be narcissistic as narcissists have tendencies to manipulate people and form connections with them just to seek an advantage. It is not necessary that those people who come across as a false twin flame will be narcissistic, but there are chances of them being narcissistic.
Thus there are a few possibilities that the twin flame that you may come across may or may not be a narcissist, but the inclination is more towards that they may be a narcissist in the form of a False Narcissistic Twin Flame.
The narcissist’s blame game is strong. They may manipulate, abuse, and deflect from taking any blame. They would just vanish while taking responsibility and would always blame others for their failures.
9. Pathological Liers
Narcissists have a huge ego to satisfy, so they always want to prove a point by lying. They just consider themselves smarter than others. The egoistic narcissist often tends to lie due to their deceiving characteristics and traits. Narcissists believe that the Truth makes them feel inferior to others.
10. Contract Breaker
A narcissist may agree to everything and anything you may have to say, but would always do the opposite. They are like con artists and can convince you to do anything they wish. They are shrewd and may accuse you of breaking the contract.
Narcissists often exploit others to have personal gains. Thus they may reach out to people who can fulfill their interests by acting and doing as per the narcissist’s wishes and desires. Both men and women have different ways of exploiting others.
Narcissistic males may imply force, physical aggression or intimidate their victims, while female narcissists may not resort to anything related to physical aggression. They may manipulate your emotions and may have passive-aggressive ways to fulfill their wishes.
Manipulation is a narcissist’s go-to tactic while dealing with others in order to get what they need.
Narcissists believe that they are made for special treatment and deserve all the privileges as they are better than others.
Narcissists are filled with arrogance and their attitude towards others says it all. They have a belief that they are better than others, and thus narcissists use their sense of being superior to showcase their self-importance to be the elephant in the room.
15. Inability to handle Criticism
A narcissist finds it really difficult to accept any sort of criticism. They hardly can take any sort of feedback, so criticism is not their strong pursuit. They might be enraged when someone criticizes them as they think criticism is a direct attack on their self-belief of being perfect and superior beings.
16. Hates Confrontations
Narcissists would never agree that they have some kind of lack; a personality disorder. They would never accept that they are in the wrong, or they would never accept their fault. Narcissists do not realize the trouble they are causing you, also they do not acknowledge that they are causing trouble.
The most expected and go-to defense mechanism for narcissists is gaslighting their victims into believing what they want them to believe. So when you figure out a narcissist, their first reaction or action would be gaslighting as a part of their defense and make you believe that you are the narcissist here, and they are the victim.
17. Image Making
Narcissists often love their perfect image, to appear as the perfect partner, friend, son, or father to outsiders.
Narcissists live in a constant fear of being exposed. They fear that their real toxic self might be exposed and thus are suspicious of everything and everyone.
Projections are an outcome of self-guilt and deprived self-reflection. A narcissistic person lacks both. Narcissists never feel guilt or do not have any concepts of self-reflection.
Narcissists do not want their grandiose image to be tarnished by their wrongdoings. So they blame or point fingers at others. This is the reason narcissistic projections are more common, frequent, and intense.
20. Emotional Vacuum
A narcissist is a vacuum for sucking in all emotions and emotional support that they might receive from their victims and might leave them later once they are done. Their victims may have feelings of being used, cheated, and deceived.
How is Narcissistic Personality Disorder Diagnosed?
Narcissistic Personality Disorder is typically diagnosed by mental health experts that may include a licensed therapist, psychiatrist, or psychologist. The experts do this by talking to the individual, knowing their thoughts and feelings, history, and emotional well-being.
This can also include other people’s viewpoints which may include family members, friends, or someone who has closely observed the person. A narcissist must display the above-mentioned traits in order to be treated.
The exact cause of narcissistic personality disorder is yet unknown, but it is believed that various factors do play a crucial role in inclining people towards narcissistic traits. Narcissism is believed to be the result of various factors including genetic factors, environmental factors, heredity, parenting style, and certain brain mutations.
You may find it difficult to deal with someone who is a narcissist. But you can make this easier by learning how to recognize the signs of narcissism.
It becomes difficult to detect such an individual and also ascertain their abusive and manipulative personality.
Also, it is a little difficult to figure out narcissists initially, but you might eventually figure them out due to their peculiar narcissistic traits.