Are Narcissists Likely to Kill Their Spouse? (Know From Their Behavior)

Are Narcissists Likely to kill their Spouse? Can narcissists hurt their partners and mean just to cease their existence? Can they be this cruel? Do Narcissists know that they are hurting someone both physically and mentally? Let the inquisitive bugs in your head settle here, as this article is an insight into a sensitive topic like this.

Narcissism has become a catchphrase so fashionable that almost everybody is able to associate either themselves, someone they know, or someone they might have been with. Narcissists are highly sensitive and insecure and always in a fright that they may get exposed, hence they can easily take offense very personally.

However, it is important to note that narcissism is a personality disorder that can lead to abusive and dangerous behavior toward others and especially toward those who are closely associated with them. Narcissists tend to exhibit control, feel highly entitled to special treatment, lack empathy, have a fragile sense of self-esteem, and can be very harsh and inattentive toward their partners. This can result in emotional, verbal, and physical abuse towards their partner, but this does not necessarily mean they can be murderous or are prone to killing people, especially their partners in most cases.

Yet, if you feel threatened by someone or some situation, it is important to seek professional help. If you suspect that you or anyone around you is experiencing abuse or some sort of such a threat from a narcissistic partner then seeking help from experts, and professionals, and most importantly reaching out to the people(family and friends) becomes essential here. Reach out to seek help from the people you can put the utmost trust.

Defining Narcissism

To understand NPD(Narcissistic Personality Disorder) or Narcisisim in simple form or pedestrian language, let us put it in simple words. NPD(Narcissistic Personality Disorder) is nothing but portraying these common toxic traits in an intensified state than others. And that is how these common toxic traits that are possessed by all but simply are intensified for a person with narcissistic personality disorder make them a little from others.

Every human possesses these traits of ego, admiration, inquisitiveness, complexity of relationships, self-worth, self-praise, control over situations in life as much as possible, expecting attention from others, some troubles in relationships, rudeness, selfishness, lack of self-reflection, and all such traits that make us human. It is just that people who possess these in more amounts due to certain situations in life, parental pressure, and many more reasons are declared narcissists, and in psychological terms, such people suffer from NPD(Narcissistic Personality Disorder). They portray these emotions or in this case negative traits in a greater magnitude than others.

If a person is diagnosed with NPD(Narcissistic Personality Disorder), then that may be responsible for many behavioral and personality changes for a narcissistic person. So coming across strange behaviors of a narcissistic person would not come to you as a surprise. When you live with a narcissist, you have to be ready to expect the unexpected sometimes.

People with Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) often view themselves as superior to others and expect constant praise and attention. They may also be prone to aggression and manipulation when they feel threatened or challenged.

Given these traits, it is natural to wonder whether narcissists are more likely to kill their spouses than other people. Narcissists often have an exaggerated sense of their talents and abilities and may expect others to recognize their superiority without question. They may also become more frustrated, angry, or depressed when they do not receive the attention they believe they deserve.

Individuals with Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD), typically have difficulties maintaining relationships because their behavior can be selfish, manipulative, and emotionally abusive. Narcissists can be very much demanding and can demand their partners to fulfill their every need without reciprocating or expressing gratitude. In some cases, when a narcissist does not feel satisfied with their partners, they may engage in extramarital affairs or display cruelty towards their partners to fortify their own superiority.

Are Narcissists Likely to Kill Their Spouse? (Know From Their Behavior) – All about Spousal Homicide

While not all people with Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) are violent, there is a link between the disorder and spousal homicide. According to a few studies and research articles, published in the Journal of Family Violence, narcissism was the strongest predictor of intimate partner violence among a group of college students. Individuals with NPD were more likely to engage in physical aggression, verbal abuse, and sexual coercion than those non-narcissistic individuals or peers.

According to one of the articles, “Narcissism, Rage, and Murder – Is there a link?” published by Dr. Joni E Johnston, on one of the most trending online destinations for mental health and behavioral science; Psychology Today. According to her,

"Narcissism is something we all have. A certain amount of narcissism helps us reach for the stars, believe in ourselves, motivate others, and meet our own needs while we are taking care of others; it is the core of healthy self-esteem". 

But as we are quite aware of the quote, “Excess of everything is worst; even if it is best otherwise. – VIKRMN”. Excessive indulgence or excessive of any habit, trait, or quality can have negative consequences. It can have adverse effects on us and everyone around us. Therefore, moderation is the key to a balanced and healthy life.

She also added,

People with a narcissistic personality disorder, or NPD, are so addicted to feeling special that they lie, steal, cheat, and do whatever it takes in order to get their high. Inevitably, because all their energy is invested in maintaining and fueling their grandiose and entitled self-image, their relationships derail and their capacity for psychological growth is stunted. Its pathological extreme can lead to various forms of violence, such as stalking, battering, or murder."

How to know if a Narcissist is capable of Spousal Homicide?

There are a few signs that you can spot to keep yourself safe from a narcissist’s negative attempts and threats. Narcissists seem all caring, charming, and perfect partners to the world, but only the one who inhabits with them knows the reality and their selves behind those closed doors of their homes. Let us know a few signs or steps to affirm that your narcissistic partner is capable of spousal homicide.

1. Find out whether your partner has any history of domestic violence.

2. Find out whether you have been isolated by your partner from your family, friends, or even the community.

3. Find out any hidden weapons, or try to remember if you have ever encountered them when they were armed with any kind of knives, bats, forks, etc. Have they ever used any weapons in domestic violence?

4. Keep a check on their alcohol consumption or any kind of drug. Also, note the incidents when they have abused you both mentally and physically after an overdose of alcohol or any kind of intoxicant.

5. Try to note any incidents where your partner might have mentioned something killing or ending your life, such as threats or even curses.

6. Note what language do they opt for when they are angry? How abusive do they get when they are really furious?

7. Try to remember or take note of if ever you have faced any incident that included any physical harm like beating, battering, choking, strangling, or throwing objects at you.

If narcissistic behavior can lead to intimate partner violence, it is natural to wonder whether it can also lead to spousal homicide. Many Psychology experts and Researchers have found that there are some distinct patterns in the behavior of individuals who kill their spouses, and many of these patterns are consistent with a narcissistic personality disorder. Many factors including substance abuse, mental health issues, and relationship problems can contribute to spousal homicide or such thoughts. In particular,

Some harmful traits of individuals who possess spouse homicidal thoughts

Individuals who commit spousal homicide often display such traits, like,

Jealousy and Possessiveness

Narcissists become so jealous when someone praises their partner rather than praising them. If their partners receive any sort of attention, even though the attention is harmless, it creates havoc in a narcissist’s mind as they feel their desired attention is being stolen by their partner. Even if the reality is suggesting the opposite they get easily jealous when their partner steals the spotlight.

Obsessive Behavior

Individuals who have spouse homicidal thoughts may become fixated on their partners, monitoring their movements and steps constantly and getting furious or suspicious of them or any such incident that happens out of their control.

Emotional Abuse

Narcissists may use emotional abuse to control their spouses, by gaslighting them, belittling them and their interests, guilt-tripping them, and always showing a no satisfaction toward their partners.

Extreme Reactions

Narcissists may become enraged or violent when they feel their sense of superiority is threatened, or when their spouses challenge their opinions or assert their autonomy.


Narcissists may try to isolate their partners from their family, friends, and any helpful resources or people that may help their partners to gain help or escape from the relationship.

These behavioral traits might be suggestive that there may indeed be a link between narcissism and spousal homicide. However, it really becomes important here to note that not all people with Narcissistic Personality Disorder will become violent, and not all narcissists have spouse homicidal thoughts.

In Conclusion

While there may be a link between narcissism and spouse homicide or such thoughts, it is important to remember that not all people with Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) are violent and also do not possess such negative thoughts or do not even try to attempt killing their spouses. Narcissistic abuse can have many severe mental and physical health injuries and consequences and it is never acceptable and justifiable.

If you suspect that you or anyone around you is experiencing abuse or some sort of such a threat from a narcissistic partner then seeking help from experts, and professionals, and most importantly reaching out to the people(family and friends) becomes essential here. Reach out to seek help from the people you can put the utmost trust.

With intervention and dedication, recovery from narcissistic abuse is possible, and you can move on to live a healthier and more fulfilling life. Healing is very important after facing narcissistic abuse, manipulation, toxicity, and so much negativity in life.

Ella Carrillo

Ella Carrillo

Hey Reader, I am Ella, an Online and Offline Therapist holding an experience of 6 years in this field. From Relationship, Depression, and Personality Disorder to Narcissistic problems, I have helped a lot of people find their solutions. Upon gathering a number of common problems that people face, I decided to put the information on this blog so that anyone can get their answers easily.

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