How does a Narcissist react to being Dumped? Narcissists have some real power over you when you are with them, which sounds terrifying. So when you dump them, that needs a lot of courage, willpower, and positivity to set yourself free from the abuse.
So if you are an ex-victim of a narcissistic relationship or you are thinking of leaving the narcissistic relationship and are curious to know, “How Does a Narcissist React to Being Dumped?” then keep reading further as this article will be discussing the same and also provide some additional information, tips and a fulfilling conclusion to make your reading time succeed in.
When a narcissist loses their source of supply, they cannot just let this go lightly. Them letting you go would not be easy, also there might be a long-going hoovering that would not let you dump them easily. They might curse you, would try to defame you, would smear your reputation, and also might bad-mouth you to the next person you might try to get with. Narcissists can stoop low sometimes when they are not ready to let you go easily or they have no substitute to fulfill their needs of narcissistic supply.
Acknowledging the fact that the narcissist would not let you go easily, they would linger around for a while, they might even take an act of revenge and it is going to be a long process if you are not strong-headed. Knowing what you are getting into exactly would make the discarding or dumping process easy for you and you would know how narcissists react when you break up or terminate the relationship with them. Dating a narcissist can be the best dating experience (when the relationship is new or when you do not know about their toxicity) or be the worst dating experience (when you dump them after acknowledging their true toxic personalities).
Narcissists in particular are known to struggle with rejection and often respond to being dumped in ways that are inappropriate, dramatic, and dangerous at times. Let us know more about narcissism first.
What is Narcissism?
Narcissism is a personality disorder that is characterized by an intense preoccupation with oneself, self-absorption, and egocentrism. Narcissists view themselves as superior to others and are often obsessed with power, status, and success. People with Narcissistic Personality Disorder do not hesitate even once to exploit others for their own good. They have an inflated sense of self-significance, a constant need for attention, and admiration, and a high sense of entitlement. Such people believe that they deserve special treatment with immediate attention from people and also have a grandiose sense of self-importance.
How Does a Narcissist React to Being Dumped? (Exact Reactions)
A narcissist tends to react strongly to being dumped because it challenges their sense of superiority and control over the relationship. When you dump someone you might expect some common reactions like sadness, shut down, bargaining, denial, shock, and finally acceptance, but with narcissists it is different. Dumping a narcissist would make them more furious, unaccepting (as it is a toil on their ego), revengeful, and malicious.
It is important to note here that their reactions are not because you have left them, but because of their ego; because dumping or discarding is their way of dealing with unwanted people and it is you who dumped them thus it hurt their self-pride and ego and thus they are left with a revoked feeling. There is no one definite answer to know the exact reactions of a narcissist as everyone faces being dumped differently. Though every individual might react differently to being dumped thus here below, a few common reactions of a narcissist are mentioned, which may remain constant for many narcissists on being dumped.
A narcissist may feel a wave of burning anger and lash out at their partners for “betraying them” or “ending the relationship”. As their ego bruises become clearly visible, they may opt for their primary and most expected reactions of being angry with you or hurting you with some hurtful words that might leave you scarred. Narcissists may feel hurt, betrayed, and humiliated when they are dumped.
Narcissists are experts at getting revenge. When you dump them, they would find the means to hurt you. They would be so worked up about them losing their grip and control of you that they might affirmatively seek revenge. They can try to make you jealous by immediately finding a new partner and showing you that they have already moved past you.
An Act of being indifferent and feeling detached
Narcissists would exhibit detachment and could act indifferent after being dumped. They may pretend like the relationship did not matter or that it was something that they outgrew immediately. It is important to note that their reaction is not because they have moved on but more because of their ego. They want their partner to think that they do not care, and also their ego will also not allow them to appear vulnerable to their partner or themselves.
Some narcissists may simply refuse to accept that they have been dumped and continue to pursue their ex-partner or act as if nothing has changed. It is a common reaction among narcissists after being dumped, as they are unable to accept the fact that they have lost their source of supply.
A narcissist may try to manipulate their ex-partner into feeling guilty for ending the relationship by making them feel responsible for hurting them. They would make their partner feel belittled and would pledge to make them feel culpable or blamable.
Narcissists cannot accept the fact that you dumped them, instead, they would tell you that they were already planning to do so before you did it. This way they may be able to save their self-esteem and also support their ego.
Some narcissists might paint themselves as the victim and portray their ex-partner as the villain to garner sympathy and attention. As the bruises to their ego become clearer they may start acting like a victim. They may create false scenarios about how they were mistreated or how their ex-partner took an advantage of them. Their narratives always omit their mistakes, and shamelessly paint themselves as a victim. They could also harass, stalk, or would pester their ex-partners.
Moving on quickly or finding a replacement
A narcissist may try to show off their ability to move on from the relationship quickly and find a new partner to boost their ego and self-esteem.
Narcissists would not substantiate the fact that they survive and fit into the world with the help of supply, as they feel nothing could weaken their existence, but without supply, they would not be able to function smoothly and effortlessly. They are unable to process the thought of not having a source of supply so they always have their sources of supply lined up.
Deflection of pain
Narcissists would easily deflect their pain. Instead of acknowledging their emotions and working through the pain of separation and rejection, they would instead tend to project their hurt onto others. They may lash out and blame their ex-partner for their unhappiness and pain.
Narcissists deflect their feelings and emotions to avoid taking the blame for their manipulative behavior and their toxicity in the relationship and would just not accept their mistakes. They may criticize their ex’s decision during break up, engage in character assassination, or even start a smear campaign to gain control over their ex’s judgment to leave.
Everything is a game of control and winning for a narcissist
The narcissist would try to use the break up as a means to gain more control over the relationship and their partner. Narcissist always maintains a well-knit web of lies, manipulative truths, and tactics to carefully shield their true and undesirable selves and gain superiority in the relationship. So when a partner dumps them this web is broken and people are able to see their real selves which are always behind the blurry threads of well-crafted lies.
They may play all sorts of games with their partner who is about to leave them including isolation, blackmailing, love bombing, gaslighting, their transformation into a better being, and whatnot.
By implying everything as a game here, it is being referred to in any way in which they might cacoon you. They can be creative at this point and just be ready to be surprised by unexpected ways through which they might try to get in touch with you once they get the slightest for you to dump them. They would use all sorts of flattery and fawning to lure you for giving in.
When narcissists find themselves or their efforts in a not-so-winning situation, then they become depressed, hopeless, worthless, or even in some cases find themselves surrounded by suicidal thoughts. They may experience feelings that are not genuine for their ex-partners. They feel that they have lost control over their ex-partner’s life and thus start feeling gloomy and depressed. They feel completely lost and in vain when they lose control and start feeling hopeless regarding their relationship.
Being in a state of Shock or Confusion
Narcissists might act shocked and astounded just to create a little drama just to make you feel more guilty about their partner’s decision to leave them. This is a very unlikely reaction though but they might opt for anything when it comes to proving their validity and their partner’s shortcoming.
Narcissists may bargain hopelessly with their ex-partners to not lose their source of supply. They would present themselves as drastically changed individuals than in the past. They would present their best version to lure you back. They might prove that they have changed and try to reach you as a better individual to get you back. But just remember narcissists and change often do not go hand in hand.
All of a sudden they would be full of emotions and sensitivity and would also act in the same manner. But remember this is all till they win you back. They would act gullible and would be ready to change for you. But remember change and narcissism are just opposites.
A narcissistic person cannot change so suddenly unless and until they have some motive or ill intention. So do not get swayed by their fake repentance or remorse and think thoroughly before taking any decision. Remorse, repentance, change, guilt, or forgiveness are mere words for a narcissist. They would be acting all gullible and would show repentance after you break up with them, but it is just until you come back into their life.
Disparaging their ex-partners
Narcissists would immediately make some disparaging comments about their ex-partners. They would not leave a chance to insult, bad mouth, or have ill thoughts about their exes. Being dumped is equivalent to being insulted in the view of a narcissist as someone as superior and entitled as they cannot be dumped by someone as their partner. This might tarnish their image and so they would just take this as an insult and would obliterate you.
Narcissists fear the feeling of abandonment and by dumping them you might have triggered that fear. This act might wound their ego and to shield that ego a narcissist would do anything to insult you back.
When you dump a narcissist, they feel like you have rejected them. When you reject someone they might be sad, hurt, or angry with you but in the case of a narcissist, they would make it personally about them, take that as an insult, and might even plan to take an act of revenge.
The exact same reaction of a narcissist to being dumped may vary depending on the individual, but ultimately, it is rooted in their fragile ego. rejection triggers a narcissist’s need for control and may reveal their true nature of manipulation, bullying, and attempts to maintain power and control.
Acknowledging the fact that the narcissist would not let you go easily, they would linger around for a while, they might even take an act of revenge and it is going to be a long process if you are not strong-headed. Knowing what you are getting into exactly would make the discarding or dumping process easy for you and you would know how narcissists react when you break up or terminate the relationship with them.
A breakup can cause a narcissist to be in a state of confusion, detachment, playing the victim, deflecting their feelings, trying to gain control, and much more. And when every attempt fails, a narcissist might go into a state of depression and hopelessness.
So to avoid being negatively influenced by their reactions it becomes essential to be acknowledged of them before deciding to dump them.
And if you have already dumped your narcissistic partner then, do not be lured by a narcissist once you break up with them. Just recollect all the bitter memories with them before reconciling. Just keep moving forward.
Yes! breaking up with a narcissist can be a cynical and delusional act, but once you are out there is no going back.
Trust yourself and all the beautiful emotions that you have regained after breaking up with a narcissist.