How to Destroy a Narcissist’s Ego? You might be able to know and understand the true meaning of ego when you have someone narcissistic around you or involved in your life. Narcissists are egoistic, self-obsessed, and selfish beings, who would not appreciate or show gratitude for tolerating them as they are really difficult personalities to handle.
Narcissists are often characterized by their boosted sense of self-importance, self-pride, and self-needs. With a narcissist, everything is just about them. Narcissists thrive upon the attention, adoration, and validation that they receive from others, and what makes them distinguished from others is the way they think and the way they behave, which is totally selfish and mean. Narcissists have huge egos to satisfy and when someone hurts their ego, that someone is doomed. Narcissists seek revenge, or at least they would humiliate and devalue you for hurting their pride and ego.
Narcissists and their inflated egos
Narcissists have inflated egos and we are all well aware of that fact. Narcissists are emotionally fragile and tend to get hurt by the slightest criticism, negation, or disagreement. For narcissists, their inflated ego is sort of like a defense mechanism for them, as it can save them from their underlying feelings of low self-esteem, self-worth, and vulnerability that comes with internal emotional conflict.
Narcissists constantly juggle between being a super confident and a gloomy, undermined, and highly doubted inadequate self. They have a constant fear that they might be disliked by others or they might be repudiated by others if they do not maintain their grandiose self-image. Thus they create a desirable self-image that projects everything that others may find desirable and attractive. They make this fake self-image to fight the feelings of insufficiency of self-pride and fragile self-esteem.
Why do Narcissists have inflated egos?
Narcissists are self-obsessed beings, so it is natural that they would have a boosted sense of self-esteem or self-importance. They think that they are the ultimate personalities that anyone can have in their lives. They constantly have a sense of entitlement as they think they are superior to others in all matters and they need to be treated specially. They have a constant and immoderate need to acquire admiration or adoration from others. Due to their low self-esteem, they also seek constant validation from others either to prove how special and unique they are.
Narcissists have a constant need to gain admiration from others due to their insecurities, internal emotional struggles, childhood trauma, and fragile self-esteem. They feel that they are superior to others and thus they display this with their behavior. Narcissists seek validation not just to prove their superiority but also to maintain their self-esteem. They need validation to sustain their self-esteem which also helps them in maintaining their grandiose self-image.
They tend to choose all that gives them an ego boost, like promoting their own self, over-achieving and exaggerating their achievements, and showing off their particular traits and skills which they think would make them superior to others. If this does not work for them, they would simply humiliate, disregard and belittle others just to prove their worthiness and also boost their ego.
It is important to note that not all egotistic are narcissists and not all people with high self-esteem and high confidence may have high ego.
Reasons why a narcissist might have an inflated ego,
The ego can significantly affect the relationships of a person. The ego is a natural emotion that keeps a person’s development on track and also allows a person to fulfill their needs and desires. But ego can be healthy when it does not overpower your entire personality. When it does start overpowering your own personality, it becomes an unhealthy trait. It can destroy relationships, and impact a person’s own personality making them toxic towards other people.
Due to their low self-esteem and insecurities -Narcissists have an underlying fear of lagging behind. They constantly have the urge to be supreme everywhere and also demand that other people admire them. Yet they have a deep-rooted fear of being unworthy and have many insecurities to overcome. They fear that their feelings of being unworthy and their insecurities might overpower their overall fake personality, so they use their ego as a defense mechanism to maintain their grandeur.
Sense of Entitlement – A sense of entitlement can always lead to a boosted ego as they think they are special and much more deserving than others. Thus their grandiosity and sense of entitlement can lead to an inflated ego.
Childhood Trauma – Childhood traumas can often lead to a deflated self-image. Narcissistic traits can develop due to a neglected childhood where a child is abused for love achieving and becoming perfect. Thus such childhood traumas can create a personality that is always demanding validation from others which may develop an egotistic personality.
Lack of Empathy – Lack of empathy often leads to a lack of emotions. When a person lacks empathy they are unable to understand other people’s emotions and always think that they are superior to others. They often focus on their own needs and desires neglecting other people’s wishes. Thus they can develop an inflated ego due to the sense of entitlement.
So when you have to deal with a narcissist who has an inflated ego, it becomes important that you deal with them smartly as it is a challenging task. Their manipulation, overconfidence, and self-centered behavior might frustrate you, and when you go against them you may have to face their rage.
How to Destroy a Narcissist’s Ego?
There are a few ways that may guide towards effective strategies to deal with narcissists with an inflated egos.
But it is important to make a note that challenging a narcissist’s ego should not turn into something with malicious intent, it should just be used to protect your own righteous self from the narcissist’s manipulation.
1. Setting clear boundaries
Narcissists hardly respect other people’s boundaries and often try to cross them thus it becomes crucial to mark your boundaries clearly as their behavior is ego-driven. Setting boundaries might initially upset the narcissist in your life at first, but with time this would ensure your mental peace, individuality, privacy, and worth. Be less accessible to them. You decide for yourself what behavior is acceptable and what is not. Setting boundaries would allow you to not break them thus preventing you to give into narcissistic manipulative tactics.
Making your requirements or boundaries of acceptable and unacceptable behavior is a must while dealing with a narcissist. They would simply walk all over you if you do not create some limitations and boundaries. Expecting change from a narcissist is nearly impossible but at least how you should be treated and can be treated is in your hands. This can totally piss them off but would bring you a little respect in the relationship.
2. Staying unaffected by avoiding being overly emotional
“No reaction is a big reaction for a narcissist.” Without providing any reaction to their toxic and unbearable behavior is a big piss-off moment for a narcissist. It proves that they no longer can manipulate you or take advantage of you just because they have an inflated ego.
Showing no emotions is a great way to prove your point in an argument with a narcissist. Exaggerating the situation and making a fuss is a narcissist thing. A narcissist always expects a loud and outgrowing reaction from you, so when just remaining calm would create havoc in a narcissist’s mind.
3. Focus on building your self-esteem and work on self-care
When a narcissist is involved in your life, they can totally invade your self-respect, self-esteem, and your self-pride. You start feeling worthless as they make you believe so. They shatter your self-image and make you completely dependent on them to seek validation before making any decisions. They always prove that they are more superior to you and thus sabotage your self-esteem. So developing your self-esteem can be like a big slap on the narcissist’s ego virtually.
Self-esteem can be developed by working on yourself. Self-care makes you strong-willed and thus helps you in developing your self-esteem and self-pride. Working on your self-confidence, your goals, and mental peace can be your initial steps toward self-care.
4. Limit your access to them
Limiting your access to the narcissist can be the best way to save yourself from dealing with them. Limiting your access may involve cutting off communication, providing silent treatment, or just ignoring them entirely.
Not being able to reach you is a big turn-off or piss-off moment for a narcissist. So use this opportunity to your benefit. When you feel you cannot take a narcissist anymore or need a break from their toxicity, just go no contact or block them. Do not pick up calls, block them from social media, or just do not meet them. This can just set off a narcissist.
Give the silent treatment to a narcissist, they would just be vexed by your behavior. Narcissists are the most self-centered beings and every relationship you have with them is just about them and their benefits. So going no contact or cutting contact with them from time to time from a narcissist is very important for you in the relationship to hold your ground.
5. Seek Help
Seeking help from your friends and family and building a big support system can help you save yourself from emotionally draining, abusive, and toxic narcissists. When you feel that the narcissist is overpowering your emotional needs and ignoring them, they do not get swayed by their behavior and do not react immediately. Seek support from your parents, siblings, friends, therapists, or any loved one that you can rely on emotionally.
6. Hurting their Pride
Not agreeing with a narcissist would hurt their pride and ego. They would be hurt and their ego would burn to ashes. Hurting their Pride and Ego would move them from their core, and thus would leave a deep impact on them. Humiliating them or going against them would leave them agitated. So when you decide to hurt a narcissist’s pride or ego, they would be harsh, feel agitated, and feel insulted.
You cannot eradicate a narcissist’s ego or you cannot stop them completely, but what you can do is safeguard yourself from their toxic, manipulative, and abusive behavioral tactics by using the above-mentioned strategies. But it is important to make a note that challenging a narcissist’s ego should not turn into something with malicious intent, it should just be used to protect your own righteous self from the narcissist’s manipulation.
Narcissists like to keep you on your toes and while doing that you can lose yourself in the process. You might notice that you do everything that makes them happy but care least for your own happiness. You start to fake your happiness, avoid your needs and always take care of the narcissist. Drop this behavior and start caring for yourself. This will definitely be a blow to the narcissist’s egoistic behavior.
- How To Protect A Child From A Narcissistic Father? – 10 Ways - September 1, 2023
- Games that Narcissists Play – Reasons and Ways to Cope - August 31, 2023
- Are Narcissists Happy? – Uncovering the Truth - August 29, 2023