How Dating A Narcissist Changes You For The Better? – 9 Reasons (Looking At The Positives)

by Ella Carrillo · February 2, 2024

When referring to narcissism, you may always come across negative and criticizing pieces of information in general. But for once let us look at the positives of being with a narcissist and know how dating a Narcissist changes you for the better.

Now you might be wondering, what good could ever come out of dating a narcissist? Do not judge the narcissist to be any lesser. Narcissists are some of the smartest, most charming, persuasive, hardworking, overachievers, self-invested, and most confident.

Narcissists have this magnetic aura that can attract anyone they put their eyes on. They continuously work on themselves to impress people through their progress and achievements. To keep achieving more and more things in life, they also do not stop learning as their inquisitive nature guides them to be zealous and always looking out for new information.

They are the rule breakers and thus also the pioneers of some amazing jump-start projects or doing out-of-the-things in a lifetime. Let us know the narcissist in brief.

A narcissist is someone who suffers from a mental health disorder that affects their life so much that it may hinder them and the people around them too. Narcissism is a mental health disorder in which people have an inflated sense of self, a lack of empathy, a constant need for admiration, adoration, and validation, have deep-rooted insecurities and project them onto others to feel fulfilled, resist negatively to criticism and are emotionally dependent on others.

Thus narcissists do not fit exactly into the description of being a good love interest or a dating partner. Thus narcissists can be not-so-good partners to date or love, but they teach a whole lot of things and help you make choices.

For example, if we look at the positives of dating a narcissist, they can teach you what kind of partner you should not choose or what level of endurance you have. These are just a few instances. Thus let us look at the positives of dating a narcissist for a change.

How Dating A Narcissist Changes You For The Better? – 9 Reasons

If you have dated a narcissist, you might already know how the relationship is both good and bad. Some people may also suggest that their decision to date a toxic person for regrettable and they start doubting their life choices after dating a narcissist.

But nothing can just be bad, as there are always two sides to everything. Thus dating a narcissist does not just come with all regrettable things, there can be some positives too.

Dating a narcissist can not be all bad, there are good things too. There are some good things when you date a narcissist that can make you a better person. Claiming this without proof would not be enough, thus here a list of reasons is provided for you to decide.

This may come as a surprise for most people but dating a narcissist can also make you a better person. But how? Let us know further,

1. It helps you notice unacceptable behavior

What separates acceptable levels of annoying and aggravating behavior from unacceptable levels of toxic behavior? It is YOU who would decide what is acceptable and what is not by drawing boundaries.

Dating a narcissist would help you discriminate between toxic and unacceptable behavior from subtle aggravating behavior. Occasional negative behavior can be acceptable as anyone can have mood swings, but how are you supposed to react when some toxic behavior becomes a regular episode?

Being with narcissists would help you learn how to differentiate between a partner who is focused on themselves and is selfish most of the time apart from a day or two when they are having a rough day.

By being with the narcissist you can figure out what behavior is just beyond your tolerance and unhealthy and you also learn how to define what is acceptable and unacceptable in the relationship.

So if you are or have been with someone with narcissistic traits, you might be aware of how their behavior is unacceptable and how it tests your tolerance and patience. Thus by being with a narcissist, you learn what is unacceptable behavior and how to cope with such behavior.

2. It increases your Patience

Dating a narcissist requires an enormous amount of patience, perseverance, and tolerance. Thus it increases your patience levels.

Narcissists are very demanding, they would demand undivided attention, admiration, validation, emotional support, and love from their partners but would never be present for their partners when they require their support.

They would be degrading and devaluing their partners when they try to oppose them. They expect their partner to serve them round the clock and use their insecurities to manipulate them.

The sad part is that their manipulation is not stopping anytime soon. It is a toxic loop where their partners are stuck.

Now you might be wondering, what is so good about being in such a relationship?

When you are with someone so toxic, your patience level increases, and also you learn to adjust and be comfortable with yourself as your partner is unsupportive. You become a mature and enduring person when you date someone childish, manipulative, and selfish.

3. It builds your strength

Dating someone toxic makes your endurance level higher allowing you to be stronger and tougher. It can help you get through difficult situations more efficiently.

Dating an emotionally damaged person is going to be challenging, but you may also find ways to heal them and boost your self-confidence. You can be a more enduring, patient, and caring person by being with someone who needs care and healing.

When you date someone toxic, you know how to build boundaries and be comfortable with yourself. Thus when you are forced to face such a negative behavior, it automatically activates the authoritative, strong, and responsible side of you.

4. It helps you define your limits of control

Dating a toxic person helps you to define the limits of control. You learn to respect yourself but also you become more familiar with the reality of being with that person. Thus it also increases your acceptance levels.

Narcissists are usually controlling and they can be even more toxic when they lose control over their partners.

So when you define your limits, it makes you a realist because you are indeed able to create your limits, gain control, learn to stand up to toxic behavior, find peace within chaos, resolve relationship issues on your own, and exercise patience.

You also realize how much you can control in the relationship. You can not force someone to love you or change them. So no matter how hard you try to change the narcissist, you might eventually have to give in as changing them is challenging.

Thus you come to terms that not everything is controllable and leaving situations and people as they are can be beneficial for you.

5. It can make you prioritize mental health and emotional health

By being with a narcissistic partner, you may understand that narcissism is different than possessing a few narcissistic traits or suffering through some nominal mental health issue. So when you are with someone narcissistic, you realize indeed how important is mental health wellness.

You come to realize how big of an issue it is to suffer from mental health issues and thus you may be compassionate towards such people. You may be a more understanding, empathetic, sympathetic, warm-hearted, and sensitive person by being around someone who suffers from a mental health disorder.

You may try to help this person as much as you can and thus be patient with them. You can also find ways to heal them and gain more knowledge about the illness during this process.

So when you date a narcissist you can come to the realization how mental and emotional health is important and how it impacts relationships.

6. It boosts your self-respect

When you date a narcissist you become more aware of what you have been going through in the relationship after you started dating them. You become aware of your suffering and also know that it is not a healthy relationship.

So what is so fruitful about dating a narcissist?

When you have been a part of a toxic at least you are aware of what kind of relationship you wish to avoid in the future. You also realize your coping mechanisms and unlock your strengths which come in terms of emotional stability, building self-trust, and building patience, endurance, and compassion for others.

Dating a narcissist may teach you how to stand up for yourself, trust your instincts, and go against someone you love. Narcissists continuously take advantage of you when they know you may not resist because you love them.

But the biggest thing you can learn here is how you stay strong and stand up for yourself against the person you love.

Thus you learn to respect yourself more and you grow to be a better person.

7. It increases your pattern recognition

Toxic people often follow the same people when it comes to dating and love. It all starts with idolization, devaluation, and discard. So when you are with a toxic person indeed, a narcissist you start realizing their patterns of abuse.

As Narcissism exists on a spectrum, it is on a wild spread in modern times. From normal, and healthy, to a little toxic, pathological, and fully blown unhealthy; it exists on a spectrum or a continuum that can only be clinically tested. Thus the possibility of you coming across a narcissist in your lifetime has higher chances.

Though everyone is a little narcissistic, narcissism is hazardous when it starts hindering the daily life of an individual and everyone around them.

Thus everyone is narcissistic in their gloomy days, but a narcissist will have repeat patterns of narcissism, and thus they can be distinguished from others.

When narcissists face a setback, criticism, or the slightest inconvenience, they may launch a pity party, mistreat you, or take advantage of you by seeking emotional support from you. Thus these patterns become regular and relationships become toxic.

Thus you know when you are stuck in a loop of toxic behavioral patterns when you date a narcisist. Thus such people ultimately guide what kind of relationship you would want to avoid for future reference.

8. It makes you more self-aware

One of the most valuable outcomes of dating a narcissist is that you become more self-aware. You become aware of your coping mechanisms to toxicity, emotional triggers, emotional vulnerabilities, and response to a toxic relationship, and still make the relationship work on broken grounds with the narcissist continuously on your nerves.

When you find yourself in unhealthy situations, you become more self-aware of your behavior and responses. Dating a narcissist would reveal your new and untouched sides along with the full-blown possibility of a person you can be while dealing with difficult people.

You also become aware of your faults, weaknesses, triggers, blind spots, and emotional capacity and thus become more self-aware.

9. It paints a clear picture of what you do not want

Dating a narcissist would be enough for you to paint a clear picture of what you do not want in a relationship or love life. Thus it becomes a lesson for you what not to do or what not to want in a relationship.

It is also necessary to know what not to do along with what to do to balance and maintain a peaceful life. Dating a narcissist would make you appreciate other aspects of other partners who genuinely like to be with you without any personal agendas and thus you would be able to appreciate and keep those people in your life.

By dating a narcissist you can segregate a whole bunch of people you want and you do not want in your life which is more than enough to maintain good and healthy relationships.

Important Takeaway

Dating a narcissist might cost you many things but there are a few hand-picked good things too. If you are still dealing with the narcissist find ways to not get affected and if you have already parted ways focus on healing your soul and self from the narcissistic abuse.

Narcissists do not fit exactly into the description of being a good love interest or a dating partner. Thus narcissists can be not-so-good partners to date or love, but they teach a whole lot of things and help you make choices.

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Ella Carrillo

Hey Reader, I am Ella, an Online and Offline Therapist holding an experience of 6 years in this field.

From Relationship, Depression, and Personality Disorder to Narcissistic problems, I have helped a lot of people find their solutions. Upon gathering a number of common problems that people face, I decided to put the information on this blog so that anyone can get their answers easily.

How Dating A Narcissist Changes You For The Better? – 9 Reasons (Looking At The Positives)

How Dating A Narcissist Changes You For The Better? – 9 Reasons