How do Narcissists end Relationships? Do they hoover around you even after breaking up? Can a narcissist end a relationship with no strings attached? If you are also perplexed and thinking about similar questions then please keep reading further as we will be providing answers to the question, “How Do Narcissists End Relationships?” and also provide informative and sure ways to confirm they do end the relationship.
Can a narcissist completely break up and not have nasty thoughts to take revenge? Can you break up effortlessly with a narcissist? How do narcissists react when you break up? Do you know when a narcissist is done with you? How can you know whether a narcissist is done with you? All these questions sum up to the ultimate question and that is, “How Do Narcissists End Relationships?” also “How to know whether a narcissist is done with you?”
What can be the dating experience like, while dating a narcissist?
There are three phases of dating a Narcissist,
1. Attraction or Idealization Phase
The Attraction or Idealization phase is the step where they spot you and grab your attraction, like spotting a target for obtaining their supply.
2. Devaluation Phase
Once they gain your complete trust, this is when they start playing with your feelings and thoughts by using their manipulative tactics. This is the phase when they would suck the positivity out of you and drain you.
3. Discard Phase or Rejection Phase
The Discard phase is nothing but the time when a narcissist uses you completely until their satisfaction like their puppet, and when they no longer need you or find someone else they just discard you like something unimportant. This is the phase where after breaking up they still hoover around you. They simply would not cut all ties with you and be vague about ending the relationship.
This cycle is like a Ferris wheel, it continues to spin. A narcissist would not stop manipulating you, again and again, it is you who needs to realize and step out. Dating a narcissist is itself challenging. You have to keep up with their unrealistic expectations, their tantrums, emotional unavailability, and peculiar traits.
Dating a narcissist is very puzzling as you cannot figure at what stage you are at while dating them. You cannot put all pieces of a puzzle together while dating a narcissist as their behavior is different every time you try to approach them. When they are in a good mood and happy after obtaining a supply from you they would be appreciating your presence in their life, but as soon as you try to prove them wrong or put your thought forward, they would be arrogant and you would not hear from them for days.
You almost lose your self-worth, self-love, and self-respect and most importantly you lose yourself dating a narcissist. You are completely blinded by their manipulative tactics that you almost forget what a normal relationship looks like. You begin to doubt yourself, your life choices, and even sometimes your sanity. Because a narcissist can affect that profoundly if you are not self-conscious and blindly follow how a narcissist guides.
What would a narcissist do when they lose interest while dating you but still choose to obtain supply from you?
They would put you on read, will not call back, or simply just go MIA(Missing in Action). After leaving you or ignoring you for weeks, they would expect nothing to change and simply begin to act as if nothing has changed between you. They would leave you and you might be questioning yourself about what went wrong. But! Remember it is not your fault, it is just that they are bored with you and leave you without any notice.
They might even haul you while they are dating others. You might not even get the slightest hint about their slyness until they sweep the last bits of supply that they can get from you. They would not leave you easily. Narcissist Hoovers around you like they would not let go of you even though you do not want to be in touch, especially after breakups or when you leave them.
Is it difficult to date a narcissist?
It can be really difficult to break up with a narcissist as they can blackmail you, take revenge, or hoover around for a long period of time. They do this because they do not want to lose control over their source of supply. And also it is always difficult to date a narcissist due to their anger issues and unhealthy behavior so they have to be dependent on a lot of people to get their supply. There are many ways to know know, “How do Narcissists end Relationships?” or How to make sure you get a complete closure and a defined ending to your relationship with a narcissist. So let us know this in detail with explanatory points below.
How do Narcissists end Relationships?
There are a few ways in which a narcissist can end a relationship with you,
- They would feel agitated and would be harsh toward you
- They would blame you for everything
- They would choose to fight for insignificant aspects
- They would speak ill of you and tell all sorts of made-up lies about you
- They would spread rumors about you
- Humiliating you through verbal assault
- They start Ghosting you or Gas lighting
- They do not stop taking advantage of you
- A sudden drop in communication
- Sudden behavioral changes
- They would make you feel like you are unlovable
- They would try to seek revenge
These points hold more importance in the case when a narcissist decides to break up first. But when you break up first, expect some unexpected turns in your life as they might not leave that easily at least not without an act of revenge or a hint of hoovering. Usually, a narcissistic partner would want you back even after a breakup or not cut all ties, but this may differ from person to person. So try and understand your partner more thoroughly. These points may differ for many individuals but more or less they are similar for all types of narcissists. Do not expect a mature breakup or even a satisfactory closure while ending things with a narcissist.
1. They would feel agitated and would be harsh toward you
When a Narcissist wants to end things with you, they would try to distance themselves from you and they feel more agitated than usual when you ask them about this. They would be harsh with their words. They would try to hurt you emotionally. They would use some abusive vocabulary, that can hurt you and make you feel guilty. They will be saying such things which you might not be willing to hear. They would call you names, would be mean, and try to make you feel regretful so that you can be back into their lives with all that regret.
2. They would blame you for everything
Be ready to be pinned for all the blame for break up. It is them who want to break up, but would hold you responsible for it. A narcissist cannot accept their mistake because according to them, they are never wrong. This is when they make you feel you have done something wrong, but in reality, they are fed up with you and just want to discard you from their life, as they have found a new interest.
Dealing with a Narcissistic breakup? Be ready for a long blame game. Despite all the arguments and verbal insults, Narcissists would definitely find a way to come back at you. They are experts in putting all the blame on others. Once they feel you are not going to be putting up with a Narcissist, they will find a way and make up all kinds of lies. Even though seems pretty clear who is at fault, a Narcissist would never take the blame and behave as if you are the one making all the mistakes.
3. They would choose to fight for insignificant aspects
Picking up fights over insignificant topics and getting agitated at your slightest mistakes can be one of the ways which explains how a narcissist wants to end things with you or already has ended without your knowledge. When you bug them about this they would insult you, pick massive fights and choose verbal abuse. Some topics might be so silly, that you find yourself at the lowest form of yourself as you do not recognize their pattern to abandon you without disclosing much. You might even end things on the behalf of their typical irritating behavior, they think so and thus they choose to pick fights almost on a regular basis.
They would pick fights for topics like calling them in between of the day, bugging them with constant texts, or asking them to meet when they are busy.
4. They would speak ill of you and tell all sorts of made-up lies about you
Bitching about you is one of their major tricks to lead you to end things with them. They would speak ill of you and tell all sorts of made-up lies about you to your friends, relatives, or people you both hang out with and thus making it indirectly visible that they want to end things. They would not tell you directly but choose this indirect way of telling things.
5. They would spread rumors about you
A narcissist would not hesitate even once to spread rumors about you and would tell all sorts of stories and made-up lies to turn people around you against you. They would wish all people just cut ties with you and then you have to suffer. They would not allow people to know your side of the story. They would make you the villain of the story that they are writing, i.e. the breakup story.
6. Humiliating you through verbal assault
Verbal assault is the top trick when they wish to declare an end to the relationship. They might treat you badly and even create humiliating situations for you. Humiliating you at the cost of your mental peace can be pleasing to them. Embarrassing you in front of a crowd or the people you might be acquainted with would be one of the ways to end things indirectly. They would mention ending things frequently and casually.
7. They start Ghosting you or Gas lighting
Be ready to be part of the narcissist one-sided game. They would catch the phrases, or dialogues and use them against you when a narcissist decided to end things with you. Gaslighting you can be the topmost priority for a Narcissist once their purpose with you is completed. When a narcissist feels they can no longer take advantage of you or from you, that’s when they break their relationship with you. So, be ready mentally to expect an abrupt break to your relationship as they only serve the purpose until their benefit or until they get their supply.
8. They do not stop taking advantage of you
A narcissist would definitely not want to cut complete ties with you and would keep their options open for the future. There are several reasons why a Narcissist wishes to be friends with you post-breakup. They might even haul you while they are dating others. You might not even get the slightest hint about their slyness until they sweep the last bits of supply that they can get from you. They would not leave you easily. Narcissist Hoovers around you like they would not let go of you even though you do not want to be in touch, especially after breakups or when you leave them.
9. A sudden drop in communication
Notice a sudden drop in communication when a narcissist is planning to end things with you. They would avoid talking to you, just answer whatever you ask, and would never initiate communication. They would never text your first, it is always you who is checking on them. They would not pick up your calls, avoid meeting you and always put you on seen for messages. They would put you on read, will not call back, or simply just go MIA(Missing in Action).
10. Sudden behavioral changes
Sudden behavioral changes like ignoring you, not giving any importance to you or what you say, being completely lost in their world, staying disloyal, cheating on you, flirting openly, seeking interest in other people, discussing others, and much more. If you notice any such sudden changes, then a narcissist is soon planning to end things with you.
11. They would make you feel like you are unlovable
Instead of making it clear that they want to break up, they would make you feel like something is wrong with you, you have changed and become unlovable. This is a clear red flag and thus you should be ready to hear about the end of your relationship soon.
12. They would try to seek revenge
This is in case you decide to break up first. This might cost you your mental peace and narcissists may not even reflect on what they have done wrong. Breaking up with them first might lead to them taking an act of revenge on you for this, which can be ruinous for you.
How Do Narcissists End Relationships? They would not state clearly about breaking up, instead would make you feel like something is wrong with you, you have changed and become unlovable. This is a clear red flag and thus you should be ready to hear about the end of your relationship soon. This is one of the most common ways to, ” How do Narcissists end Relationships?”.
Do not expect a mature breakup or even a satisfactory closure while ending things with a narcissist.
If you notice any above-mentioned signs in your partner, take it as a hint or sign of them willing to break up, or discuss it clearly with your narcissistic partner if you want to make it clear, and free yourself from such a toxic relationship as soon as possible.